The very fact that you are on this page suggests that you, or someone you love, is going through a difficult season. The very fact that you are on this page also suggests that you have strength, courage, and a will to make a step toward greater hope, joy, and healing.

Here are a few suggestions that I have found helpful in my interactions with clients, and in my own life.


You are going through a tough time right now. Today is not the day to push yourself harder. Emotionally, you are pushing as hard as you can. Take a walk, take a bath, find a friend. Maybe you need to ask someone to watch your children for an hour so you can collect your thoughts. Watch your favorite movie with a pint of ice cream if you need to! Just be sure to allow yourself the grace and acceptance to take care of your heart.

Keeping your emotions bottled up can cause more pain in the end.
It's like a pressure cooker that has a faulty release valve. When the pressure builds, the cooker explodes leaving a huge mess. Letting out your feelings can help you avoid an emotional crisis. Call a friend, write it down, or use art as an outlet for your most raw emotions.

Telling yourself soothing, calming messages can help you see your situation in a new light. For example, telling yourself, "I feel bad now, but it won't last forever," or "I have enough ______(patience, support, willpower) to make it thorough this time." Giving yourself these messages can sometimes give you enough peace to make it through the day.

  There is a Swedish proverb that says, "Shared joys are doubled, shared sorrows are halved." You are in a season where you need continued support. Find a trusted friend or family member, spiritual guide, or counselor who can speak truth and love into your life.

If you are having thoughts of hurting yourself, or someone else, please don't wait. Call 911 for immediate assistance or go to the nearest emergency room. When things get more steady, there will be plenty of time to make an appointment with the counselor that's right for you.

Please know that in this difficult time, you are not alone. I'd love to be of help to you, so please reach out. Feel welcome to call me to set up a free initial consultation and see how I can help you make it through this tough time.

From my heart to yours,


Kelly Duggan Shearer, M.A., LMFT

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Offices in Pasadena, CA (near Lake Avenue and California Boulevard) and Glendora, CA
(near the 57 and 210 freeway junction).